On the Road to Find Out

Seriously, where are they all? Uruguay takes a little getting used to. There is only one speed here and it doesn’t involve the use of any muscle. The streets are invariably empty. I am told that people tend to stay at home unless they have something to do, and seeing as there is not a great amount to do, they tend to stay at home quite a lot. There are a few exceptions though:

(more…)

I have finally been seduced by mate.

The conversion has taken a little while but I always knew it was coming. The communal drinking ritual and price a fraction of coffee or tea always made this inevitable.

(more…)

They took my scissors and cheese sandwich as I passed through customs. I’m not really sure they understand the nature of swine flu.

As with most people travelling from Buenos Aires to Uruguay, I am making a stopoff in Colonia. A beautiful World Heritage Site town; a Bob Ross interpretation of colonial Uruguay, probably not aware of it’s aesthetic kinship to Portmeirion. I could then go on to say how the place resembles ‘The Prisoner’ tv series more so than Portmeirion itself, the eerie shell of a colonial era, a town full of menacing history ala Salem, the echoes of day-to-day life ringing around the crumbling edifices. This would in fact be a load of horse shit.

(more…)

After 4 weeks in Buenos Aires my initial writing habit has begun to whither. There are a number of reasons for this:

• the appearance of Paynod & Rach

Okay, there’s just one reason for this, but it’s a good reason. Time has been occupied by parillas, football and and a wide variety of housemates. Most notable impact has to go to this fella:

Choripan

(more…)

There’s something I’ve been holding back. Something I’ve been meaning to write for a while, but things have kept getting in my path. Not for much longer.

When I was in Rio I made one huge discovery which almost blew the top of my head off. It’s all to do with this fella:

(more…)

Just a quick update.

Mario, the portero, asked me if I wanted to go to a gay club with him tonight. At first I thought he was joking, but after asking me 5 or 6 times I had to take him seriously. I feel our relationship could be heading to the next level! I have brushed him off for now though. I told him next week would be better. I hope he doesn’t realise that I’m moving out on Thursday!

I’m currently staying in an apartment in Palermo Hollywood (this is it’s official name but someone had a go at me yesterday for saying it. Apparently it’s a bit pompous. He much prefers Palermo Viejo. Maybe that’s what I should go with) in Buenos Aires.

My roommate is a guy called Alaric. He’s from the US (though if you ask him where he’s from he’ll say New Mexico. I think he’s trying to hide his roots!). He spends all day in bed. Although to be fair I should write; he spends all day in his bed, with his girlfriend. Normally they have the door open so I get to see into their world. He works away on his laptop while she lies there. Sometime they close the door. I can only imagine what they get up to then. Scrabble maybe. It’s normally followed by a shower so they must be pretty heated games.

The best thing about living in an apartment here though is the portero, which is basically a janitor. It’s taken me a while to get used to kissing him every time I see him, but other than that this guy is an absolute gem. Every question I have he has an answer. He knows everything. And he fixes everything double quick. Only two days ago did we have a leaky tap. Problem was solved in about 10 minutes. He does keep insisting I need to strengthen up though, mainly through buying polenta. I think maybe he’s on the polenta marketing board or something.

It’s impossible to ignore the portero’s advice though and so I have bought polenta. No immediate effect yet but I am hopeful.

(Oh yeah, and days of grapes and honey. This is the Spanish version of Days of Milk and Honey. I think maybe they’re forgetting the versatility of milk. Although thinking about this you can make wine out of grapes. You can’t make alcohol out of milk and it does go a bit funny after a few days (unless you have a magical Ecoworks fridge) so I might have to rethink this. Umm…)

I feel a little like Bobby Brown first thing in the morning; bewildered, confused, wondering what´s taking Whitney so long with those bleeding eggs.

I´m not sure I was ready for the city just yet. Wishing I could get out of bed, make my way to the porch, lie in a hammock and listen to the trees while occasional cats come by to say hello, with Daniela making some amazing lunch in the kitchen which she is about to tell me is ready.

I think I had it pretty cushy in that house of the forest. I may just have to go back there at some point.

Okay, so it’s not gonna be possible to forget Iguazu falls in a hurry. Those are some big waterfalls!

The falls!

But there´s one other thing that sticks in my mind. This is the sight of a man flicking a cigarette into Rio Iguazu. He didn’t notice that I had seem him do this. His wife did and I think from the way her eyes widened before shirkily placing themselves back in her husband’s glance, she could see the rage that was coming over my face.

On the main viewpoint of the waterfalls you can look down and see a dozen plastic bottles nestled in amongst the rocks.

For some reason I assumed there would be more awareness of pollution and the environment in Brazil, after all it is their rainforest that is being chopped down for hamburgers.

My thinking was already heading in this direction though, due to the number of bags I was being given at the super market. Checkout girls looked on in amazement if I refused one. “Do you not want a bag?” “No”, “Are you sure?” “Yes”, “So you don’t want a bag then?” “No” And almost every item gets its own bag. Fruit goes in one bag, drinks in another, cold drinks in another still. Bar of soap? Gets its own bag.

On entering Parque Nacional da Iguazu, there are signs everywhere reading ‘UNESCO World Heritage Site’, ‘Vote for the New Seven Wonders of the World’, ‘Protect the Environment’. How can someone just throw a cigarette into the river? I just find the whole thing baffling.

Maybe I'm allergic

Next: I am on my way to Buenos Aires in a Super Cama. I have fully reclinable capabilities. And I have just been served warm beef and potatoes. This really is luxury.

Hold on, I almost forgot to talk about the beaches. They are surely the best thing about Florianopolis. There’s 42 of them in total. 22 of which have waves good enough for surfing. Some of these beaches are on the main roads, some are hidden away behind mountains begging to be trekked to. Everyone I went to was a complete sauna, with hot stones and everything.

The best beach by far is Praia da Lagoinha do Leste. Take a bus to Armação. 10 minutes walk south from Praia da Armação is Praia do Matadeiro. A further 2 hours walk from Matadeiro is Lagoinha do Leste. The walk has to be one of the best I have ever done. There are so many false corners, putting your heart in your mouth as you know there is going to be a beautiful beach coming soon. After 3 false corners, the beach opens up. A tasty mile of open beach with clear blue waters, bunched in by green mountains on all sides. I never wanted to get in the ocean so much.

Lagoinha do Leste

Praia Brava is another of my favourite beaches. Only problem was the amount of handbags around me. I think it must have been clearing out day at the old people’s home.

Praia Brava

I thought this photo looked a little bit like the cover of On The Beach. Now I´m not so sure.

Look, Neil Young!

Who´s this then?

Okay, so what other beaches were there.

Praia do Pantano do Sul & Praia da Solidão – amazingly quiet beaches, perfect for strumming a few chords in the afternoon or having a nap

Praia do Saquinho – about 2 rocks on this beach. One of which had some young couple perched a top. I think this is the place for an evening snack

Praia de Naufragados – I never reached Naufragados. I tried to trek but gave up when the heat got to me and I had ran out of water. One day I will find you Naufragados!!!

Praia da Joaquina & Praia Mole – perfect surfing beaches. Get your wetsuit on though cause it´s a bit chilly out there. Kinda like skegness, but without the constant stream of baby buggies

Praia da Barra da Lagoa – crowded beach, full of surfers but no waves. On a good day probably worth getting the board out. Otherwise just sit and watch the girls go by

Praia do Pantano do Sul